Shine On! - Our Natural SOLHSista Sophia

Welcome back SOLHSistas! I hope everyone had a refreshing and fun-filled summer! It was wonderful getting to know so many beautiful women this summer through individual consultations and SOLHair Parties. Thanks again for introducing your friends and family to SO Lovely Hair.

Now I’d like to introduce you to another dynamic SOLHSista, Sophia!

She truly puts the SO in SO Lovely Hair! Not only is she my videographer but she’s SO beautiful, SO funny, SO smart, and SO talented. She has tried every style, product, technique and color for hair. She was a real life human chameleon!  But now she’s back on the path of NATURAL healthy hair. And her knowledge of healthy hair products, styles, and techniques runneth deep. Let’s see how it all started!

Thanks Sophia for letting me pull you from behind the camera! Your hair journey has been interesting to say the least. How did it all begin?

As a child, I remember my hair just always being a mess. (lol) I was known for breaking combs and brushes. It was long, thick, and relaxed as far back as I can remember. My curls were “too thick” and I was too "tender headed", as my mom always said--which was partly true.

But my hair was long until 6th grade. My dad took me for what was supposed to be a trim and I had the lady chop my hair off to my ears :) It was a hot mess and my mom was so mad.

My hair would only grow to about my shoulders and it would break off.  So I’d cut it again--all the while relaxing and coloring.

So when did you start your healthy hair journey?

I stopped getting relaxers when I was about 18. I started looking at all the white girls around me with long flowing pretty hair and thought, “They don’t do all this mess to their hair and it grows! So maybe I need to chill out with all of that (constant flat irons, blow dryers, coloring, manipulation)”. My friends at the time didn’t flat iron or blow dry often, if at all.  One of them said she never even used a brush or comb in her hair. She just finger combed it when it had conditioner in it. That made a big impact on my techniques.

It’s ironic but the good traits I learned for my hair, didn’t even come from women with my type of hair. Those techniques were the start though.

That’s interesting. I haven’t heard that source of inspiration before. How did you transition from relaxed to natural hair?

At first I just trimmed little by little and before long all the damaged and relaxed hair was gone. It didn’t take long. I loved the thought that my hair was natural! I wasn’t so sure of wearing it curly though. To straighten it, I’d use big barreled curling irons after I blow dried it. Then I met my best friend the flat iron :) I was flat ironing my hair daily to keep it bone straight--flying in the wind! Since it was natural, thick and curly it wouldn’t stay bone straight long.  So I’d flat iron every time I came home. to keep it straight. 

Then I colored it blonde.  When the stylist removed the towel from my head, all the other clients’ faces made me afraid to look in the mirror--and for good reason. It was fried! I failed to mention this was my third time in 3 months having my hair lightened. Each time I went lighter and in more areas. My hair was literally falling out with each hand movement through my hair. But by the next day I was rocking it (with blue contacts).  

I saw a picture of myself and thought “What in the world am I doing?! I’m constantly trying to wear my hair like someone else instead of ME.”  I colored it back to black and started the healthy part of my natural hair journey.

So at this point did you realize natural hair doesn’t necessarily mean healthy hair? 

Natural hair def doesnt mean healthy hair. I was natural for years before my hair was actually healthy. All the heat, and coloring was jackin my hair up left and right. If your not taking care of your hair properly natural or relaxed you can still have very unhealthy hair.

So I started getting online looking up natural products and finding sites for woman with hair like mine. Forums became my best friend. I learned so much about hair, MY hair, product ingredients--everything. I’d spend hours reading up on everything I could about natural hair.  My hair grew so fast and became so thick. I loved it!

I’d only flat iron it maybe twice a year. It was down my back!

Did you have any set backs? If so, how did you overcome them?

In 2010, an hour and a half into just BLOW DRYING (my stupid comb attachment kept breaking off because my hair is so thick). I got a relaxer again--without thinking twice. I regretted it instantly!!! It didn’t feel the same, not even close. Then I knew I had altered my hair in a way I really didn’t like. I'm not anti-relaxer, I’m just anti-ME-having-a-relaxer.

I missed my natural hair. So Feb 2011 I big chopped and cut off my bra strap length hair to about half an inch long (curly).

What do you feel are some of the benefits of having natural hair?

I love everything about natural hair. It’s versatility, strength, beauty. To me it says, “YOU can take your views of what is beautiful --and toss them!  Me and my big, curly, frizzy, nappy-headed, brown-eyed, brown-skinned self is beautiful!” It’s unique and beautiful. I’m no longer scared of rain, pools or showers. It no longer takes a fortress to keep the water away from my head.(lol)

 I love that! Can you tell us a little about your routine?

I take biotin and some other vitamins. I try to drink at least 92 ozs of water a day. I keep a close eye on what I put in my hair and how I take it out. I didn’t use to tie my hair up at night till this last relaxer bout. But now I literally can’t go to sleep without tying my hair up. I moisturize and seal daily. I do wash-n-go’s daily. If my hair feels dry I’ll put it in twists and that usually takes care of it being dry. I deep condition when I remember to. I really just do what it needs based off how it looks and feels. I’m trying to stay away from direct heat as much as possible. That’s basically it. I just use natural products with all natural ingredients. Keep my scalp stimulated with oil massages. Take care of my body from the inside as well :) I know it will pay off in the end.

Thanks for sharing your hair story with us Sophia! If you’d like to follow Sophia’s hair journey check out her YouTube Channel at www.YouTube.com/Sophiams85.

Till next time Ladies!!

Shine On! -- SOLHSista Ryna

Welcome to the first of our Hair Profile Series! It's very important to see how the moisture-balance system works on different hair types.


The first SOLHSista to shine is my dear friend Ryna. As mentioned in my hair story she introduced me to the ingredient knowledge I needed to start my healthy hair journey. She's also the best example of someone who's hair type is normally considered too coarse to grow long and healthy. Both of her parents are West African and she has been blessed with the beautiful skin, bright smile and strong hair of the African people. So what put her on the healthy hair path? Let's see!

Hi Ryna! Thanks for being the first hair profile on The After Party! Please, tell us about your hair journey. What was your experience with hair as a child?

As a child, my mom did my hair. I wore my hair in braids on and off for several years until I was in the tenth grade. 

By then, I had gone back and forth several times from having natural hair to relaxed hair. I would keep my hair braided until it was about shoulder length, and then have the urge to relax. I would beg my mom to relax my hair until she gave in. After all, I wanted to fit in with all the kids at school. So, I would rock my newly relaxed and flat-ironed hair in a ponytail just like all the other girls at school, not realizing that my hair was vanishing before my eyes! I would rock that ponytail and bangs until my hair broke off to ear length. By then, my mom would braid my hair again; slowly trimming off the relaxed ends as time went by, swearing never to relax my hair again. But sure enough, when my hair grew out to the coveted shoulder length, I would beg for a relaxer and so the cycle would repeat.

Over and Over again through the years, I just thought we (black women) had drawn the short straw when it came to hair; we were cursed with difficult hair, hair that would never grow past shoulder length and was impossible to maintain. I just figured I was bound to wear braids for life.

Do you think having braids for so long helped your hair, harmed it, or a little of both? 

I would say a little of both. On one hand, wearing braids allowed my hair to grow and flourish in its natural state.  Yet, it also prevented me from really learning about my type of hair. Looking back on it, wearing braids was just sort of a quick fix, a disguise for my real hair. It allowed me to have that coveted shoulder length hair in a matter of hours, without really working for it.  Although wearing braids continually was a sure fire way to grow my hair, I did not realize that it was not the healthiest for my hair. Upon removing my braids in every two or so months, I would notice how dry and brittle my hair felt. I just figured that's how our hair was: dry, and brittle.  Little did I know I was depriving it of essential ingredients:  moisture and protein. With my lack of knowledge, my quick fix was to just grease my scalp, and slap some pink oil lotion on my hair and call it a day. 

What made you start your healthy hair journey?

Well, the final straw was when I had finally achieved armpit length hair after weaving my hair continuously for two years for my wedding.

My Weave

I was extremely happy with the length of my hair, and was determined to take care of it. I figured my biggest downfall in taking care of my hair was my usage of heat. Heat was the enemy!  So, I would flat iron and blow-dry my hair only once a week, shampoo and deep condition once every two weeks, and grease my scalp and hair daily.  I was doing everything right...or so I thought.  Despite following this regimen, I noticed on a daily basis that dreaded hair in the sink, on your clothes, and on the bathroom floor. My hair slowly but surely broke off from armpit length to right above neck length in a matter of 4 months. Feeling extremely frustrated and hopeless, one night I decided to search the Internet for a solution. I figured I wasn't the only one struggling with this problem, right?  Not long into my search, I stumbled upon a social network site called "Fotki". There, I found several women who were chronicling their hair journeys, many of them, with struggles just like my own!  The thing that made this so fascinating was the proof.  I saw countless pictures and videos of women whose hair had been nasty, thin, straggly, and ear length grow their hair to an almost unbelievable bra strap length. It was AMAZING!  Thoughts and questions immediately flooded my head: What were these women doing to their hair? What products were they using? And most importantly, were they mixed or had they just been blessed with "good" hair?  That night, I can tell you that I stayed up until 3am reading and taking notes on all the information I was learning. And to answer my last question, NO. These women were not mixed! They were full-blooded sista's just like me.  Day after day, I would continue to research.   I scoured (healthy hair) sites and found that they all pretty much had the same information. With results like armpit length, bra strap length and even waist length hair, I had to give it a shot!  

How did you begin? And what's your hair type?

 I began my hair journey by first learning my hair type, and its needs. From there, I learned that I have type 4a hair, kinky and coarse.  I then narrowed down from all four sources which products I was going to use on my hair. By now, I knew what kind of products my hair needed, what to look for in a product, and what to avoid. With all that information, I was able to build a healthy hair regimen.  I threw away all my hair products that I owned that contained harsh chemicals or filler products. And let me tell you that meant all of it had to go!  In addition, I trimmed my hair to make it even and to make sure all my split ends were gone. After all, if I was going to make sure this really worked, I needed to start with a clean slate.  I went and bought all I needed to start my hair journey, and to my surprise, it was only about 5-6 products, which was a big difference from the 20 or so products I had collected over the years!

What results have you seen?

I can honestly say that after a week of following my regimen, I noticed that my hair felt moisturized. It was a feeling that I thought I knew, but clearly didn't.  My hair did not break as much as it used to. Those tiny broken little hairs in the sink, on my clothes, and on the bathroom floor slowly started to disappear until they were gone! I only noticed shedding, which I had learned was a natural, healthy process of the hair cycle. I followed my regimen religiously. And after 3-4 months, my hair was back to just above shoulder length! And the rest is history. 

Fast-forward 3 years later.  Now, I am able to enjoy my hair at a full and healthy Armpit length and hope to reach bra strap length by the summer.  

 Wet 2011 (APL)

Low and behold, the girls on “Fotki” were right! Black women are not cursed with unmanageable brittle hair.  Knowledge is power!  You can have the hair you've always dreamed of!

 March 2011

Thanks Ryna!  Shine On!

My Hair Story

The eighties were good to me! During my early childhood, my hair was always at least arm pit length (APL). 

When I was 10, I talked my mom into getting me a jheri curl. I finally had the walk-and-swing hair I envied in my classmates! Unfortunately that ended with my brother and a lighter—nuf said. We decided on a safer alternative—creamy crack a.k.a. a relaxer. It shed and broke off like crazy! But I figured it was normal.  And at shoulder length (SL) it was still longer than most people I knew. 

By the time I went to college I was ready to reclaim my natural self. I noticed there were a lot of young black ladies on campus with beautiful long hair. So I began asking questions. I found that a lot of them were natural (no chemical processes) and those that weren’t went to the salon regularly to get their hair shampooed and styled.  Since weekly visits to the salon were out of my budget, I decided to go natural.

I grew my hair out four about 8 weeks then did the big chop (BC). I loved it! I felt so free. I hadn’t realized how much time I was spending worried about my hair. It was truly liberating! I decided I was going to get to know my hair. It was about an inch long and curly (3C/4A). 

Since it was the late 90s and I wasn’t aware of any black hair blogs or websites back then, I just listened to my hair. If it was crying out for moisture-- I oiled it. If it felt dirty-- I washed it.  It became a habit to wash my hair at least once a week.  I noticed it would dry out easily so I was always applying oil or pomade.  In hindsight, the frequency of my shampoo - pomade - dirty - shampoo cycle was due to the mineral oil or petrolatum in the pomade. But it worked! My hair was healthy, strong, and growing like a weed. As it grew, I kept it in two-strand twists for a few days then I would wear it untwisted until wash day.

A year later my hair was back to shoulder length. It was amazing! What took me years to achieve with relaxed hair I achieved in one year with natural hair. So logically I stayed the course.  By the following year my hair was arm pit length (APL).  A couple years later I was mid-back length (MBL).  

But I was tired. I was spending at least three hours washing and twisting my hair—with help twice a week. I was not happy. I felt like I had become a slave to my hair again. Now that I knew my hair and what it needed I felt I could maintain it better than before. So I decided to go back to the creamy crack.

FREE AT LAST! FREE AT LAST!

I was MBL and silky straight. Back to an hour a week-wash and go. I stuck to my moisture routine. (Though I didn’t need as much) I was maintaining my length. 

Then came the fateful day at the hairdresser. I said ¼ inch all she heard was 4 and inch. Yep back to shoulder length.  And thanks to too frequent trims and relaxers (oh I see why they call it creamy crack—an unhealthy addiction to the flat edges and an aversion to new growth). My hair went back to thin and struggling. I knew I could grow long beautiful healthy hair and I didn’t want to do a BC again.

I had my first HAIR INTERVENTION when a friend (THANKS RYNA!!) introduced me to the black hair world on the internet. Long Hair Care Forum, Hairlicious Inc.,  and Keep It Simple Sista became my road maps for my new hair journey.  She showed me where to buy all my products and how to look for ingredients instead of names and descriptions. She opened up a whole new world to me when we ventured outside the ethnic hair aisle to find products. I was hooked. I made a hair care regimen and stuck to it faithfully. I stretched my relaxers 17 to 20 weeks. I moisturized and sealed day and night. I deep conditioned twice a week and wore protective styles constantly.  It was working!!

My hair is now arm pit length (APL). It’s strong and healthy. I have to yell it from the rooftops!

That’s why I started SO Lovely Hair (SOLH)!